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| Howdy absolutely no one!
So yeah, summer thus far has been absolutely amazing. Just gunna say. And what's strange is that, by all accounts, it should be sucking.
Essentially, all I've been doing is sitting around the house and playings games, with brief breaks to work on things that need to be done. Larger breaks have been taking to work a few mornings out of the week. Even more seldom breaks have been taken from the gaming to catch up with people from my extensive past.
I figured out while on a night out con una amiga that the reason why it has been so good, despite what may seem a boring line up, is that I'm living this summer for me and me alone. Every other time I have come back (almost did it right this past spring break, but not quite) I have been back here to additionally make someone else happy.
That tends to work in the short run, but in the long run I think it ruins my breaks. As of now, I am very content with life, and actually haven't reached the "dang, I'm bored with summer already" complaints.
So I'd vote that life is good, despite some peoples' attempts to make it not as bueno.
Also, I'm on a boat. Constantly. Forever. | | |
| So, I don't write here anymore, mostly because no one else does. I went through that phase of writing down everything that happened to me every day on my blogs...but I kind of need to vent something, and if you happen to actually read this (do they still send out subscription notifications?) then I don't know...don't feel that commenting is required.
So, as of such, I am single, and have been all semester.
Frankly, that doesn't bother me.
I have had three girlfriends since October 15, 2007. I kind of got into the game a bit late...but honestly I don't regret that.
I dated Elena for about three weeks. It was a very physical relationship, and I realized that she wanted more than I did, so for fear of hurting her, I broke up the relationship.
I dated Stacey for a bit under four months. We had a fairly well balanced relationship (between emotion and physicality) and I fell hard for her. Within a few weeks of getting to college and starting the hardest year of my life, she broke up with me, for lack of...well...hooking up. She wanted to hook up with people. I took it hard, and rumors I had heard while dating her suddenly became fact: she was using me for the physical aspect. To this day we don't talk. She is now pregnant with another guy's kid, which she conceived within a year of getting her first kiss (from me).
And then there was Piper...we dated twice (well, yenno, in two chunks). She was my first girlfriend. First dating bit lasted 4 months and ten days. Second one lasted a few days shy of nine months. I love her. I am in love with her. She is a brilliant creature.
However, she doesn't want to be in a relationship. We broke up the day before we both left for college. She doesn't want a relationship with anyone, so it's allegedly "nothing personal". However, it follows a pattern I have noticed.
No one will actually stay with me unless I am there physically. It seems like I am a boyfriend of convenience. Piper has different reasons than Stacey...but still, it feels the same in some ways. She has expressed certain things about this coming up winter break that only further this idea of me as a convenience boyfriend. Sadly, I think I'm going to let her get her way this time around, and I'll just swallow my pride...but what it comes down to is why is this pattern going on?
And why is it that (going back to Stacey) someone gets knocked up and pregnant, but gets to have that meaningful relationship. Yeah, she ruined her life and has to go to community college instead of FSU like she wanted...but that truly meaningful relationship is still something I envy.
There is this girl...Bree...we've been on one date, and have secured a second one before break. I really think she's cute, funny, pretty witty from what I've seen, and she's an actress, and I seem to have a thing for the theatre gals.
I made a promise to myself to be single this entire semester, so I think that, if the second date goes well and we continue to talk through break, I might ask her out in a more steady way...but that's still a good two months away...
So yeah...I just needed to vent some of that out into the public internet where anyone can read my deepest thoughts. Frankly, few will, and even fewer who really know me. Oh well. Kind of want it that way for now.
Cheers to all of you, stay healthy and well, and beatings will continue until morale improves. | | |
| I'm just kind of posting to keep this place alive...
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| Last time I was here...last Christmas?
I miss Japan
a lot
I have my window open and can hear the crickets, feel the fresh air, et cetera
I want to play man hunt again
I want to make some flash movies again...but that was alabama...so I'm getting ahead of myself again
Anyone actually still subscribe to xanga?
spleen
I want someone to call me and reminisce with me or just chat and talk about shit that us teenagers do
spleen again
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